Ganito ka rin ba mag-English?

Ganito ka rin ba mag-English?

The following is a letter found at a certain bar in Manila and has been preserved to its original, unedited form. Enjoy reading and you may try direct translation in Tagalog. Please read with feelings.

October 1996
To Marije,

I am not surprise or wonder why Dennis leave you why? What reason can you think about but you’re very fat body. I thought before that Dennis only one me to his toy but sooner or later I’m realize that he really can’t not beared or stomached to be with you anymore because of first, Dennis say he could not stand you’re habit of making pakialam all his walks (lakad) and always calling to their house what he go home or this or that.

And then he say he get ashame o me either in school or in his family and then asking to exercise you’re very, very, very fat body. But you hate it. Thought you’re the most prettiest girls he knows about. What do you think you are “Beautiful Girl” of Jose Mari Chan?

Even you are beautiful face do you think you do not have the right to called me whatever or else different name time or the other for the real purposed to insult my personality because I’m never call you names either in the front of Dennis or in the back of Dennis, but if you start already to calling me different name. I don’t have any other choice but to tell you other different name to. Like you are a PIG, FAT, OBESSED, OVERWIGHT, AND UGLY SHAPE girl. Shame to you’re body that is to a BUDING.

You can’t not blame Dennis for exchanging you to me because I am the more sexier than you when you look at us in the mirror. I’m repeat again that you are like the Luzadas when she is a girl.

Love,

The sexiest girl of D.M.

P.S.

You say that I’m the bad breathe but who is Dennis want to kissed. Me or you? And the final is me. There you go.

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This is my edited version of the letter. :)

October 1996
To Marije,

I’m not surprised why Dennis left you. Why? What reason can you think about? You have a very fat body. Before, I thought Dennis only wants me as his toy but I realized that he can’t bear to be with you. First, Dennis said that he could not stand you being so clingy and always calling at their house to ask if he’s home or not. 

And he also says that he gets ashamed to me in school and also to his family. He is asking you to exercise because you have a very fat body. And you hate it. You think you’re the prettiest girl he knows. Do you think you are the “Beautiful Girl” of Jose Mari Chan?

Even if you have a beautiful face, you don’t have the right to call me different names to insult my personality. I never called you names in front or in the back of Dennis. But if start to call me different names, I don’t have any other choice but to call you a FAT, OBESSED PIG. Shame to your body.

You can’t blame Dennis for choosing me over you because I’m sexier than you. I repeat again, you look like Luzadas when she is a girl.

Love,

The sexiest girl of D.M.

P.S.

You say that I have ba breath but who does Dennis wants to kiss? It’s me.